第4部分(第2/7 页)

　go　after　her；　he　only　stood　in　the　ruins　of　his　office；　smelling　beer

and　thinking　—　）

You　lost　your　temper。

He　rubbed　his　hand　harshly　across　his　lips　and　followed　Watson　into　the　boiler

room。　It　was　humid　in　here；　but　it　was　more　than　the　humidity　that　brought　the

sick　and　slimy　sweat　onto　his　brow　and　stomach　and　legs。　The　remembering　did

that；　it　was　a　total　thing　that　made　that　night　two　years　ago　seem　like　two

hours　ago。　There　was　no　lag。　It　brought　the　shame　and　revulsion　back；　the　sense

of　having　no　worth　at　all；　and　that　feeling　always　made　him　want　to　have　a

drink；　and　the　wanting　of　a　drink　brought　still　blacker　despair　—　would　he　ever

have　an　hour；　not　a　week　or　even　a　day；　mind　you；　but　just　one　waking　hour　when

the　craving　for　a　drink　wouldn't　surprise　him　like　this？

〃The　boiler；〃　Watson　announced。　He　pulled　a　red　and　blue　bandanna　from　his

back　pocket；　blew　his　nose　with　a　decisive　honk；　and　thrust　it　back　out　of　sight

after　a　short　peek　into　it　to　see　if　he　had　gotten　anything　interesting。

The　boiler　stood　on　four　cement　blocks；　a　long　and　cylindrical　metal　tank；

copper…jacketed　and　often　patched。　It　squatted　beneath　a　confusion　of　pipes　and

ducts　which　zigzagged　upward　into　the　high；　cobweb…festooned　basement　ceiling。

To　Jack's　right；　two　large　heating　pipes　came　through　the　wall　from　the　furnace

in　the　adjoining　room。

〃Pressure　gauge　is　here。〃　Watson　tapped　it。　〃Pounds　per　square　inch；　psi。　I

guess　you'd　know　that。　I　got　her　up　to　a　hundred　now；　and　the　rooms　get　a　little

chilly　at　night。　Few　guests　plain；　what　the　fuck。　They're　crazy　to　e　up

here　in　September　anyway。　Besides；　this　is　an　old　b