第32部分(第3/7 页)

　for　Leah　ing　up　with　a　message；　I　fancied　sometimes　I　heard　Mr。　Rochester’s　own　tread；　and　I　turned　to　the　door；　expecting　it　to　open　and　admit　him。　The　door　remained　shut；　darkness　only　came　in　through　the　window。　Still　it　was　not　late；　he　often　sent　for　me　at　seven　and　eight　o’clock；　and　it　was　yet　but　six。　Surely　I　should　not　be　wholly　disappointed　to…　night；　when　I　had　so　many　things　to　say　to　him！　I　wanted　again　to　introduce　the　subject　of　Grace　Poole；　and　to　hear　what　he　would　answer；　I　wanted　to　ask　him　plainly　if　he　really　believed　it　was　she　who　had　made　last　night’s　hideous　attempt；　and　if　so；　why　he　kept　her　wickedness　a　secret。　It　little　mattered　whether　my　curiosity　irritated　him；　I　knew　the　pleasure　of　vexing　and　soothing　him　by　turns；　it　was　one　I　chiefly　delighted　in；　and　a　sure　instinct　always　prevented　me　from　going　too　far；　beyond　the　verge　of　provocation　I　never　ventured；　on　the　extreme　brink　I　liked　well　to　try　my　skill。　Retaining　every　minute　form　of　respect；　every　propriety　of　my　station；　I　could　still　meet　him　in　argument　without　fear　or　uneasy　restraint；　this　suited　both　him　and　me。

A　tread　creaked　on　the　stairs　at　last。　Leah　made　her　appearance；　but　it　was　only　to　intimate　that　tea　was　ready　in　Mrs。　Fairfax’s　room。　Thither　I　repaired；　glad　at　least　to　go　downstairs；　for　that　brought　me；　I　imagined；　nearer　to　Mr。　Rochester’s　presence。

“You　must　want　your　tea；”　said　the　good　lady；　as　I　joined　her；　“you　ate　so　little　at　dinner。　I　am　afraid；”　she　continued；　“you　are　not　well　to…day：　you　look　flushed　and　feverish。”

“Oh；　quite　well！　I　never　felt　better。”

“Then　you　must　prove　it　by　evincing　a　good　appetite；　will　you　fill　the　teapot　while　I　knit　off　this　needle？”　Having　pleted　her　task；　she　rose　to　draw　down　the　blind；　whic