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第84部分(第1/7 页)

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rmerly municated a certain austere charm to his language and manner。 To me; he was in reality bee no longer flesh; but marble; his eye was a cold; bright; blue gem; his tongue a speaking instrument— nothing more。

All this was torture to me—refined; lingering torture。 It kept up a slow fire of indignation and a trembling trouble of grief; which harassed and crushed me altogether。 I felt how—if I were his wife; this good man; pure as the deep sunless source; could soon kill me; without drawing from my veins a single drop of blood; or receiving on his own crystal conscience the faintest stain of crime。 Especially I felt this when I made any attempt to propitiate him。 No ruth met my ruth。 He experienced no suffering from estrangement—no yearning after reconciliation; and though; more than once; my fast falling tears blistered the page over which we both bent; they produced no more effect on him than if his heart had been really a matter of stone or metal。 To his sisters; meantime; he was somewhat kinder than usual: as if afraid that mere coldness would not sufficiently convince me how pletely I was banished and banned; he added the force of contrast; and this I am sure he did not by force; but on principle。

The night before he left home; happening to see him walking in the garden about sunset; and remembering; as I looked at him; that this man; alienated as he now was; had once saved my life; and that we were near relations; I was moved to make a last attempt to regain his friendship。 I went out and approached him as he stood leaning over the little gate; I spoke to the point at once。

“St。 John; I am unhappy because you are still angry with me。 Let us be friends。”

“I hope we are friends;” was the unmoved reply; while he still watched the risi

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