第17部分(第5/7 页)

e　I　longed　to　surmount；　all　within　their　boundary　of　rock　and　heath　seemed　prison…ground；　exile　limits。　I　traced　the　white　road　winding　round　the　base　of　one　mountain；　and　vanishing　in　a　gorge　between　two；　how　I　longed　to　follow　it　farther！　I　recalled　the　time　when　I　had　travelled　that　very　road　in　a　coach；　I　remembered　descending　that　hill　at　twilight；　an　age　seemed　to　have　elapsed　since　the　day　which　brought　me　first　to　Lowood；　and　I　had　never　quitted　it　since。　My　vacations　had　all　been　spent　at　school：　Mrs。　Reed　had　never　sent　for　me　to　Gateshead；　neither　she　nor　any　of　her　family　had　ever　been　to　visit　me。　I　had　had　no　munication　by　letter　or　message　with　the　outer　world：　school…rules；　school…duties；　school…habits　and　notions；　and　voices；　and　faces；　and　phrases；　and　costumes；　and　preferences；　and　antipathies—such　was　what　I　knew　of　existence。　And　now　I　felt　that　it　was　not　enough；　I　tired　of　the　routine　of　eight　years　in　one　afternoon。　I　desired　liberty；　for　liberty　I　gasped；　for　liberty　I　uttered　a　prayer；　it　seemed　scattered　on　the　wind　then　faintly　blowing。　I　abandoned　it　and　framed　a　humbler　supplication；　for　change；　stimulus：　that　petition；　too；　seemed　swept　off　into　vague　space：　“Then；”　I　cried；　half　desperate；　“grant　me　at　least　a　new　servitude！”

Here　a　bell；　ringing　the　hour　of　supper；　called　me　downstairs。

I　was　not　free　to　resume　the　interrupted　chain　of　my　reflections　till　bedtime：　even　then　a　teacher　who　occupied　the　same　room　with　me　kept　me　from　the　subject　to　which　I　longed　to　recur；　by　a　prolonged　effusion　of　small　talk。　How　I　wished　sleep　would　silence　her。　It　seemed　as　if；　could　I　but　go　back　to　the　idea　which　had　last　entered　my　mind　as　I　stood　at　the　window；　some　inventive　suggestion　would　rise　for　my　relief。

Miss　Gryce　snore