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第47部分(第3/7 页)

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r at Lowood? The fever broke out there; and many of the pupils died。 She; however; did not die: but I said she did—I wish she had died!”

“A strange wish; Mrs。 Reed; why do you hate her so?”

“I had a dislike to her mother always; for she was my husband’s only sister; and a great favourite with him: he opposed the family’s disowning her when she made her low marriage; and when news came of her death; he wept like a simpleton。 He would send for the baby; though I entreated him rather to put it out to nurse and pay for its maintenance。 I hated it the first time I set my eyes on it—a sickly; whining; pining thing! It would wail in its cradle all night long—not screaming heartily like any other child; but whimpering and moaning。 Reed pitied it; and he used to nurse it and notice it as if it had been his own: more; indeed; than he ever noticed his own at that age。 He would try to make my children friendly to the little beggar: the darlings could not bear it; and he was angry with them when they showed their dislike。 In his last illness; he had it brought continually to his bedside; and but an hour before he died; he bound me by vow to keep the creature。 I would as soon have been charged with a pauper brat out of a workhouse: but he was weak; naturally weak。 John does not at all resemble his father; and I am glad of it: John is like me and like my brothers—he is quite a Gibson。 Oh; I wish he would cease tormenting me with letters for money? I have no more money to give him: we are getting poor。 I must send away half the servants and shut up part of the house; or let it off。 I can never submit to do that—yet how are we to get on? Two…thirds of my ine goes in paying the interest of mortgages。 John gambles dreadfully; and always loses—poor boy! He is beset by sharper

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