第38部分(第5/7 页)

　my　bosom　only　such　a　wife　as　I　could　love；　but　the　very　obviousness　of　the　advantages　to　the　husband’s　own　happiness　offered　by　this　plan　convinced　me　that　there　must　be　arguments　against　its　general　adoption　of　which　I　was　quite　ignorant：　otherwise　I　felt　sure　all　the　world　would　act　as　I　wished　to　act。

But　in　other　points；　as　well　as　this；　I　was　growing　very　lenient　to　my　master：　I　was　forgetting　all　his　faults；　for　which　I　had　once　kept　a　sharp　look…out。　It　had　formerly　been　my　endeavour　to　study　all　sides　of　his　character：　to　take　the　bad　with　the　good；　and　from　the　just　weighing　of　both；　to　form　an　equitable　judgment。　Now　I　saw　no　bad。　The　sarcasm　that　had　repelled；　the　harshness　that　had　startled　me　once；　were　only　like　keen　condiments　in　a　choice　dish：　their　presence　was　pungent；　but　their　absence　would　be　felt　as　paratively　insipid。　And　as　for　the　vague　something—was　it　a　sinister　or　a　sorrowful；　a　designing　or　a　desponding　expression？—　that　opened　upon　a　careful　observer；　now　and　then；　in　his　eye；　and　closed　again　before　one　could　fathom　the　strange　depth　partially　disclosed；　that　something　which　used　to　make　me　fear　and　shrink；　as　if　I　had　been　wandering　amongst　volcanic…looking　hills；　and　had　suddenly　felt　the　ground　quiver　and　seen　it　gape：　that　something；　I；　at　intervals；　beheld　still；　and　with　throbbing　heart；　but　not　with　palsied　nerves。　Instead　of　wishing　to　shun；　I　longed　only　to　dare—to　divine　it；　and　I　thought　Miss　Ingram　happy；　because　one　day　she　might　look　into　the　abyss　at　her　leisure；　explore　its　secrets　and　analyse　their　nature。

Meantime；　while　I　thought　only　of　my　master　and　his　future　bride—　saw　only　them；　heard　only　their　discourse；　and　considered　only　their　movements　of　importance—the　rest　of　the　party　were　occupied　with　their